The last word on the Monaco fiasco & a fashion commandment…

Ok, so in the wake of all these reports of paternity tests and arranged marriages to produce a legitimate heir, etc… The shine of the Monaco wedding has rubbed off somewhat for me, I don’t for one second pretend to know what goes on behind closed doors and I’m also one of those lasses who tends take tabloid reports with a fistful of salt. I also seem to have had one of those weeks when you catch yourself having typed “now that the week’s drawing to a close” and it is in fact only Tuesday… But whatever my misplaced sense of time, I am rounding up my wedding commentary with the worst-dressed guests from the wedding.

Firstly, orange and red is a bit of an iff combination at the best of times and add a ruffle and a large blossom print and you might well have one of the most unsightly combinations of the 21st Century (that may well be one of my ten commandments of style: Thou shalt not wear orange and red and a ruffle and a large blossom print all at once). The houndstoothe on Prince Leopold’s lady is perfect for a British military parade but not so much for a European wedding. Nor, am I fan of the mistletoe look on Princess Sophie of Isenburg (the jacquard with a plain chiffon or silk slip would have been beautiful but not so much as a two piece)…

Nor, am I a fan of the floral table cloth number on Grand Duchess Maria of Russia or Princess Virginia’s navy lace and sheer stocking and criss-cross-shoe-strap-number or the one-woman-no-bra-movement at an international wedding (eish, this is not the moment to run free and I’ll defend the right for adequate boob support to the death)…

On to the evening wear… The Dennis the Menace number – red and black chevrons are the universal standard for danger and this would certainly have been the rule, rather than the exception. And then there’s Miss Naomi Campbell… Love the Jean Paul Gaultier garb and it would have been absolutely perfect for say the CFDA Awards on someone say 10 years her junior, but all that flesh at a royal wedding dinner on the other side of 40… Um not so much, in fact it’s a FAIL. And so too is that hideous satin halter tunic number with skirt and bowtie, seriously WTF??? And yet another woman attempts the no-bra-movement look and fails miserably: Michelle Bertrand’s number would have been so much more apt at a fashion awards dinner but a black knit dress to a white tie affair. Nope, FAIL.

And this is my last word on the matter – opinion in the fashion world is divided on the matter of Charlene Wittstock and it’s been said that “she doesn’t have a fashion bone in her body” but I’m sticking to my guns on this one… If I look back at all the images I’ve amassed of Miss Wittstock I can’t help but feel that there’s a poise and a grace and an ease to her style that is very appealing; it’s certainly ageless and classic but there is also a modernity to her choices and so I shall remain a fan of the young lady (if not her choices in husband) whatever tatters her personal life may, or may not, be in.

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